The Ford Harrison

Ever wish your family vehicle had a little more “old guy swagger?”

Introducing the Ford Motor Company’s HARRISON!

A stylish throwback model, the Harrison blends adventure and with an aged, rugged look. Usually shy of the limelight at auto shows and exhibitions, the Harrison really shines when it matters most: when you’re looking for a religious artifact or chasing a nazi. Many claim that Ford’s heyday is far in the past, but the car’s features suggest otherwise:

1. Fueled mainly by whiskey/Japanese beer blend

2. Automotive special effects make it look like handling is better than it probably really is

3. Dual airbags optimize chances of saving your wife

4. Constantly malfunctioning hyperdrive feature makes escaping law enforcement more interesting for plot turns

5. Life-sized inflatable Chewbacca fits in the passenger seat for solo carpool lane driving

6. Wooden side panels celebrate the glory days of the 70s

7. Engine wear not determined based on the years, but on the mileage

8. Car’s speakers only play the work of John Williams

9. Front bumper angled downwards for minimal decrease in speed when running over a replicant

Critics have been panning the vehicle recently, but drivers and Ford fans can’t deny the opportunity to see Ford’s Harrison in action time and time again.



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